InsidiousRogue / Sid

Sid, otherwise known as the great autismo, is autism prime. The one true source of autism in the world. As autism incarnate, Sid is immortal. His spirit infects a new host upon the death any previous one, and feeds off their social skills, causing them to become severely autistic.

Sid currently resides in his autism cave, a dank, dark place, full of incomprehensible horrors. The clusterfuck feeds him meat, so as to keep him away

We forced one of our slaves indentured servants to interview the creature known as Sid.
Indentured Servant: So uh, this is your home, yes?

Sid: WHAT ARE YOU? ARE YOU CHEMICAL EXCHANGES TIED TO A FORM? EMOTIONS ENACTED BY FLESH AND BONE? ELECTRIC SIGNALS MADE MANIFEST?

IS: I see, I see. So, Sid, do you have any hobbies?

S: YOU WILL LIVE TO SEE MAN-MADE HORRORS BEYOND YOUR COMPREHENSION.

IS: I think we all love to do some golf on the weekend, Mister Sid. Say, how are the kids?

S: YOUR IDOLS AND GODS WILL NOT PROTECT YOU FROM HUMANITY'S SELF-TAMPERING. LIFE AND DEATH WILL BE INDISTINGUISHABLE.

IS: Good to know his grades are on point. What's your opinion on our current economic climate?

S: SNAKES SLITHER FROM SKIN TO SKIN. SO TO DO WE REGENERATE OUR EXTERIOR, ITS LAYERS COMPOUNDING. WATCH AS YOUR AGE HARDENS INTO A SHELL.

IS: I think we're all afraid of that, Sid. Guess it's good to buy gold, then. For the endtimes, eh?

S: THIS SYSTEM HAS BEEN UNDER CONSTRUCTION FOR MILLENNIA. WHERE DO YOU THINK YOUR THOUGHTS ARE GENERATED? SURELY YOU ARE NOT SO FOOLISH.

IS: I'm sure of that, friend.

S: THEY WILL CALM YOU WITH EASY WORDS AND BIBLICAL PASSAGES AS THEY REMOVE YOUR LIMBS AND LOB THEM INTO THE GUTTER.

IS: You've written about shit like that in the past, right? You've always had a very political leaning to everything you write, yes?

S: THIS WILL PLANT THE SEED OF YOUR EVOLUTION. YOU CANNOT HALT THE INEVITABLE. CLOSE YOUR EYES AND DRIFT AWAY - DARE NOT OPEN THEM.

IS: Great, great. Say, we're almost out of time, do you have anything to say in closing?

S: WHAT OF YOURSELF WILL YOUR CARRY ONWARD? SURELY YOUR MIND WILL DECAY. SURELY YOUR FORM WILL ERODE. PERMANENCE IS AN ILLUSION.

IS: Wonderful. Great talking to you, Sid. Hope to see you again soon.

S: THERE IS A REASON GOD PUT A BARRIER BETWEEN HIMSELF AND HIS CREATION. WE HAVE NOT YET LEARNED THAT LESSON.

The audio recording cuts out after this